music is love.

back from malaysiaaaa!
extremely relaxing trip(:

realised how much i love music..
even though im not a musician, who learn music since young.
mayb i'll want to start understanding and learning music from now,
giving myself a chance to pursue my love for music.

i might fail,
but i'll try and do my best.

music helps me relax,
music makes me happy.
music walked with me during the darkest moments of my life.

hence, i want to try.
making music my ultimate life partner(: breathe.

will be away for 2days.
malaysiaaaaa, my daddy's hometown(:
time to runaway from singapore for a break,
though it's a real short one.

looking forward to a slightly longer break in hongkong during end august, and a even longer, 3weeks break during christmas!
love spending christmas in hongkong* <3

iloveu, Ernest Tang*

start anew, shall we?

every now and then,
i wonder if we could forget about the past and all unhappiness,
start all over again - as friends once more.

i understand that time will never turn back,
and things will never be the same.

but if we try, is it possible? questions with no answers; refrained.

im a girl who wants to know why.
a girl with tons and tons of questions.
a girl who love answers.

but...

i need to stop asking, to please.
hence, the prick and uncomfort in the heart.
who cares?
no one.
so, it's there.

how does it feel to be in a normal relationship?

it's being too long, i've already forgotten the feeling.

looking at the people around,
i tried to console myself, that one day happiness will be with me.
it's hard, and im still trying each day.

especially when im doing it all by yourself.

maybe it's time to be alone again..
isn't it so me?
to be running away.

oh yes,
im running away - again.

so much thoughts.
so much feelings.
so much to say.

yet no one listen.

one single happy entry brings a thousand emtional ones.

god, help me. tired, yet meaningful *

don't mess with the zohan, was hell funny!
love adam sandle to bits*

more movies! yay!

been so busy recently,
school after work till 10pm.
SIM is so far away from home.. one hour bus ride!
omg >.< too broken; till my heart is healed.. im gone.

with a totally broken heart.
with a pair of eyes that tear each night.
with a mind that stressed too much.

too much verbal abused.

how am i supposed to be patient?
how am i supposed to cope?
how am i supposed to love?

harsh words.
unloving actions and behaviour.

how am i supposed to endure and deal with and not go insane?

insanity.

help. i need so much help.
my body, mind and soul couldn't handle anymore.

insanity.
depression.

just a matter of time. ups and downs, just a snap of my fingers.

first day of school: statistics.
so far so good - at least that's first 2 chapters done >.<

looking-forward to wednesday class: maths. - hope it's gonna be alright too >.<

...

one minute, im high in the sky.
the next, i can be down in hell.

that's how my mood and emotions moves - always on the extremes. needs to work harder, to control my mind instead of having my mind controlling my every move; which is so bad at times.

baby told me something yesterday night.

and all i can say is...

i love u, Ernest Tang Hock Him* <3 the slightest happiness will be broken; breathe.

tomorrow will be the first day of my new school.
hence, busy myself with my ultra messy room the whole morning, hoping to clear and prepare a nice study area. i'll be nerding through the next 3years, hopefully at least 2nd upper? >.<

anyway.. my room's only 1/2 way done. sighhh.
but, keeping myself busy is good for my health.
especially on my off days. keeps my mind sane and at peace.

pizza for lunch was good. convenient and simple(:

...

met up with darlin ariel ytd for movie(:
Wanted was good; love it totally * <3

...

unhappiness shall not be mentioned.
because all i need to do is to breathe... breathe.. breathe..
and i'll be fine, eventually.

plenty of challenges ahead.
so much to learn and overcome.

...and i know im gonna succeed, not only succeed but excel(: smile, because i've freed myself.

with july already here,
i've finally moved on, im finally free.

with this new start,
i'll live a new life, in fact, am living a much better life since im back from hk 2weeks back.

no more stupid arguements.
no more crazy thoughts.
no more silly tears.
no more unhappy me.

everything around me now is happy and simple(:

i love my family.
i love my boyfriend.
i love my friends.

simple things makes my world go around!