vanished.
disappeared.
gone. tired of crying.
tired of feeling unsecured.
tired of giving all.
tired of being alone.
tired of the broken heart, broken life, broke me.
basically... tired of everything.

the only people who i need, is those who need me.

and apparently, no one needs me now.

but im sure, one day..

there'll be someone whom we'll need each other in our lives - cheering each other up, smiling together in the life journey we'll be walking together, supporting each other, loving each other, needing each other - in good and even during bad times. it's being 2 years since..
...and my bf still feels the prick.

my bf just hates adidas and dkny ever since.

and i just got myself a new adidas watch.

sighhhh.. envious of people who smile in their relationship.
envious of people who get so much love from their partner.
envious of people who get the attention and respect.
envious of people who found true love.
envious of people who are able to move on.
envious of people who left me behind in the past.

mayb my love life is born to be a pain.
mayb i have to go through years and years of heartaches and tears before i finally smile.
mayb this is just my life to live.

mayb... mayb... mayb...

i'll get used to the pain.
i'll get used to those tears.
i'll get used to the loneliness.
i'll get used to those insults.

the most stupid girl ever on earth.
and the most silly too.

hurting myself over and over again, yet refusing to let go.

my life is a joke,
and the joke is on me. never know this is how it's felt...

relax. comfortable. free. calm. peace.

this is how "moving on" and "letting go" should made u feel.

unlike in the past.
those moments of uncertainty, unsettling, amazingly fast and irregular heartbeats etc.
no more, all no more.

i am gonna be a if not happy, at least peaceful girl. town. sushi. neoprint. shopping. singk.

spendspendspend...

Anna Sui lipstick.
Elle glasses.
flipflop.

...

sometimes,
i just hate knowing the fact that im getting older as the days goes by....
it makes me sad, down and scared.....

3months more before i get to see u again....
missing u terribly much.... sweet*

it's even better than honey.. [=

artist at work.

this is just what i love to do whenever i've the time.

loves* <3

end of story. it's like a cycle, a routine.

work; busy busy busy.
life goes on well.
once im free.. it's down time.
and that's when life turns to a nightmare.

so lonely.
so hollow.

hate the feeling of wanting to cry all of a sudden whenever im free.
hate myself for not able to move on from the past.
hate everything about being able to have that little rest time.
hate it when i've nothing to do.

i need to be busy.
i need distractions.

most importantly,
i need to move on. april*

it's moi birthday month! * <3
loves.

hopefully, everything goes on right.
hopefully, there's a pleasant nice sweet surprise this birthday.

hopefully... yet another sleepless night.

i need sleep.
even i don't need it mentally.
don't think my physical body can endure any longer.

when falling asleep can be such a painful process.

awwwww.
mayb a cold bath helps.